Peta Waves…with Enid Furmeister
Whoo! I bet ya’ll thought old Enid had died on account of it’s been so long since I put up one of these posts. Well, PETA will be just thrilled to know that I’m still kicking.
Lordy, the Fall is here and another Summer is come and gone. I do love the summer. Big picnics with buckets full of greasy chicken, fishing at my little pond and catching them big old catfish. They sure do put up a good fight. That is until my filet knife gets a hold of ‘em. And, of course, there is working in the garden. Now, there’s one thing where me and them Petards agree. Vegetables are important. Can you imagine a big ribeye steak without ‘em?
But one of my favorite things about the summer is the rodeo. I bet you have one of them in your town, too. We have us a good ‘un here in Sausage Hollow (that’s where I live , don’t you know) and these young cowboys look forward to it all year long. Well, this year our little rodeo got spoiled by a bunch of nekkid Petards looking to make a protest. It was a sight like you never seen. They was a running to and fro outside the rodeo arena claiming that the rodeo was a cruelty to animals. You know, I didn’t see nobody protesting when old Shakes the rodeo clown got butted by a goat during the Goat Scramble. That was cruelty to clowns if you ask me! Oh shoot, I got sidewindered!
If Peta had it’s way we wouldn’t get to have no rodeo. That’s why they decided to protest ours. Mostly we all just ignored em. Mostly, I said. Right up until the bull riding event. I was a sitting right there behind chute number two and them Petards was right up under the grandstand singing the Barney song or something. About that time they brought out the biggest bull I’ve ever seen in my life and put him in the chute. The announcer said his name was Colonel Sanders, but he sure didn’t look like no kind old Grampa from the south. Colonel Sanders had a set of nuts on him that would have made Ingrid Newkirk green with envy. I bet hers ain’t near that big. My boy Enis says that Newkirk is really a man. I tell him that ain’t nice. He’s a little slow.
Anyway, Colonel Sanders is up there in the chute when all of a sudden one of them Petards jumps up as nekkid as the day he was born and refuses to let the cowboy get on the bull’s back. Now, ain’t no self-respecting cowboy gonna let a nekkid Petard get the best of him. That cowboy spat out a big old mess of tobacco and laughed. I think he may have been laughing at the nekkid guy’s….oh, Lord….tallywacker. Eating all them vegetables sure didn’t make his cucumber grow! Next thing you know about five cowboys grabbed the Petard and tossed him right up on old Colonel Sanders’ back. In a jiffy they had a bull rope wrapped around his hand and called for the man outside to open the chute! Out they went and what a show!
Colonel Sanders spun first to the right and then just as quick back to the left. That poor cucumberless boy went flying like frog legs out of a frying pan. He landed right in the front row on top of Myrtle Jones who was eating a foot long corny dog. The poor fellow was screaming and had his mouth wide open. He swallowed half of Myrtle’s deep fried treat. The whole place was laughing so hard they couldn’t start the rodeo again for fifteen minutes. When they did them Petards was long gone.
Peta wants to take away the rodeo. I hollar bullhockey on that one! Don’t let ‘em take yours away cause you might miss out on a lot of fun if some of the Petards show up.
We might even let you borrow Colonel Sanders!
©SharonSoileau2009
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Tags: enid furmeister, PETA, rodeo
А почему у вас так мало читателей, по мне отличный блог.
Translation: “And why do you have so few readers of my great blog.”
Ну вот, админ, а вы наверное волновались – написать не написать статью. Отличная статья у вас получилась! Молодец, хороший материал – я искренне рад за вас и с интересом прочитал вашу работу. Так держать.
Translation: “Well, admin, and you’re probably worried – not write an article. Excellent article a description! Well done, good stuff – I am sincerely happy for you, and read with interest your work. Keep it up.”
Спасибо! У Вас частенько встречаются великолепные посты! На весь день поднимаете настроение.
Translation: “Thank you! Do you often find great posts! Full day lift the mood.”
Отличный материал, просто слов нет. Беру себе на заметку.
Translation: “Excellent material, just no words. I take a note.”
Сайт отличный, буду советовать своим друзьям! Добавил закладки, вот только на RSS почему-то подписаться не получается
Translation: “The site is excellent, I will advise my friends! Add a bookmark, that’s only on the RSS subscribe for some reason fails”
Nice Home Page. Thank you
Отлично пишете. Надеюсь, на вашем блоге такие посты будут появляться почаще.
Translation: “Excellent writing. I hope for your blog such posts will appear more often.”
Желаю поблагодарить вас за столь интересный пост! Сначала не вкурил немного, но прочитал снова и очень оценил. Буду теперь вас читать почаще!
Translation: “I want to thank you for the interesting post! First, not vkuril little, but read it again and very appreciated. I will now read you more often!”
Хотелось бы увидеть более развернутое продолжение этой темы на вашем блоге
Translation: “I would like to see a more detailed continuation of this topic to your blog”
Прислали сегодня в аське ссылку на ваш пост. Нисколько не жалею, что потратил время и повелся на скрытый пиар)
Translation: “They sent today to the ICQ link to your post. Not in the least regret that I spent the time and led to the hidden PR)”
Лучше материала по теме трудно найти. Спасибо.
Translation: “The best material on the topic is difficult to find. Thank you.”
Великолепный у вас сайт, буду советовать друзьям и знакомым
Translation: “Excellent you have a site, I will advise friends and”
Нужно отметить, что редко кто в рунете пишет на данную тему, очень полезное чтиво, только я бы посоветовал немного картинками разбавить
Translation: “It should be noted that hardly anyone in runet wrote on this topic, very useful Fiction, but I would suggest a little picture dilute”
Не часто встретишь такой сайт, в который создатели вкладывают не только время, но и душу.
Translation: “Not often see such a site in which the creators have invested not only time but also the soul.”
Довольно редко можно встретить такой блог, в котором сочетается не только оболочка, но и содержание.
Translation: “Quite rare to find such a blog that combines not only the shell, but also the content.”
Just browsing around and found your site. Very good post. Will be adding you to my RSS reader.
Если честно, не думал, что можно такую подробную статью написать
Translation: “To be honest, I did not think that it is possible to write such a detailed article”
Уф, осточертела эта зима, сколько мы еще мерзнуть будем
Translation: “Ugh, I’m sick of this winter, as we are going to freeze”
Not a bit!
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